What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Why do we often have strong feelings for our twin flames, even if they don't feel the same way? Is there a way to make them realize their true feelings for us?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Why do flat-earth conspiracy theorists believe that photos from space, including those of satellites, are fake?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Pokémon Fan Loses "20 Years Worth Of Data" After Performing Switch 2 Transfer - Nintendo Life

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

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Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

I wore a Trump hat to a doctor’s visit. The doctor made a strange comment, he was obviously on the opposite political point that make me uncomfortable. What shall I do on my next visit?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

I am married for 3 years. My husband keeps pressing my boobs 40-50 times a day. He never stops though I ask him not to. What I should do to stop it?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

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Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Why are Americans obese? Is it the food or is it the psychology?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

What was the most inappropriate thing your parent caught you doing as a teen? Was in the bedroom, I thought nobody else was home. My sister and I shared that bedroom but I knew she was gone. I didn’t know my dad was home though.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Why are European countries warning European travelers to be careful traveling to the United States?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Make Nazis afraid again!

The Labour Party wants to put the Winter fuel allowance and the £800,000 of gifts received by ministers behind us. Is this a real option for the people who will suffer as our new masters unapologeticly feast on freebies?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

What is the best way to get my wife to become a hotwife?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.